Hey, Thanks for the Support

Another one from Israelity…So it’s been about 16 months since I made aliyah. As in any move, there have been ups and downs but overall, things have been great. And they better be great because any oleh chadash (new immigrant) can expect to answer questions like “so ehhh….why you deed aliyah?” about 400,000 times. When Joe Israeli would ask me this, I used to say something to the effect of

“Well, I came on a six-week trip when I was fifteen and just fell in love with this place. Whenever I would visit, something inside me felt alive and until I gave living here a shot, I knew there would always be a hole in my Jewish identity. In one word? Zionism.”

It’s right around that time that his eyes start to roll to the back of his head and he short-circuits. So now I stick to the second answer: “I lost a bet.” It’s more fun to confuse them.

I’ve also learned that there’s a big difference in what Israelis say to you before you move to Israel…and AFTER. Before? Everything’s roses! “Why you not leev here? Eet’s greeeeat! Byoo-tee-fool beaches! Byoo-tee-fool WEE-men! (wink wink) Ayn makom acher! (There is no other place.)”

After?

“What ahr you, CRAY-ZEE??? I have cousin in New York, he eez meel-yon-air!!!” Hey, what happened to the first guy? “Oh, he move to New Jehr-zee…he work at mall, making lots of mah-nee.”

This place makes me laugh.