”Feesh don’t fry een deh keetchen! Deh beans don’t burn on deh…ehhhhhhhh…”

With my lease ending in a few months, I’ll be looking for a new apartment soon. Anyone who lives in Tel Aviv knows how tough that can be. From my perspective? It’s not so different from the search in New York…just in another language. If this sounds familiar, it’s because I went through the same thing 10 months ago. After making it without a living room this year, I’m definitely looking to move on up to something nicer. Next stop?

In terms of location, it shouldn’t be so difficult. Generally speaking, there’s Central Tel Aviv…and there’s Central Tel Aviv. The city is small which I think adds to the charm (and you thought it was the congenial nature at the Central Bus Station…) However, my friend and former co-worker Ari is considering a neighborhood called Florentine, a more artsy, rugged neighborhood which you might compare to the Village. (Am I the only American who ever noticed the tendency of every major city in the States to compare one of its neighborhoods to the Village, often unsuccessfully? Some cities can’t even settle on just one. Atlanta: “Oh, the Virginia-Highlands is JUST like the Village!…Oh, Little Five Points is JUST like the Village!”)

Biggest Florentine pro: cool guy as roommate, nightly men activities left to your imagination
Biggest Florentine con: close proximity to Alpha Centauri


When I asked my last roommate Hila what she thought, here was her take:

Benji: “What do you think of Florentine?”
Hila: “I don’t like eet so much…eet is like Gaza.”
Benji: “Huh, what does that mean?”
Hila: “There are many druggers, you know?”

Oh, those crazy druggers!!!!!!!!!!

When looking for an apartment, you had better be ready to jump on a place quickly. It’s a competitive jungle out there, my loyal readers. If I had any doubts, the guy at the kiosk down the street made it pretty clear when I was packing up my last place.

“Hi, do you have any empty boxes?”
“Bohk-sehs? For waht?”
(suddenly not so interested in boxes) Ehhhh…where do you leev?”
“Ummm…(trying to disregard everything Officer Friendly taught me in 1st grade)…right over there.”
“How many rooms you have?”

For now, I’m in the States for the summer with no rush. More on all THAT later…until then, I can dream. Right, Weezie?

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